life moves pretty fast

FOUR weeks since i started my job. how did that happen? wasn't it, like, yesterday that i was contemplating living in a box? but, yes, a whole month of stability now. stability being an operative word as i still dance on that sweet line between absolute poverty and fulfilled city dreams. i am equal parts shocked that it's been that long ("wait, how do i turn on the computer again?") and shocked that it's only been that long ("of course i emailed them. whaddaya think i am, dumb or something?")*

*please note, these conversations never actually happened. except the computer part. just kidding. i'm a big girl, i am.

 
THREE days since a few friends and i booked a tiny b&b for a weekend in the hamptons. because this is how we do it. also, it will be my birthday weekend. so this makes it even more #awesomesauce

TWO days since my coworker was laughing about reaching an automated message that told her to press "the hashtag" and she was all "that's for all those dumb 20-year-olds who don't know it's called a number sign! no offense, shelby." and i smiled sweetly, laughed lightly, tossed my hair, and said "oh, funny. but isn't it called a pound sign?"* hashtag THAT! #youjustgotserved  #call911cuzyouregonnaneedanambulancetotreatthatburn

*please note, this conversation actually did happen. and it was definitely hilarious.

ONE day since i saw my first play in the city. and when i say city, i mean brooklyn. and when i say play, i mean "no, it wasn't les mis." it was "a doll's house" at BAM. and it was pretty impressive/completely disturbing how men used to treat women. (and people think feminism doesn't matter. #please #asif #imnotyourdollnomo).

and now it's been one minute since i found out it was national puppy day and all productivity went out the window in favor of watching puppy videos on youtube. which reminds me, i've got dog memes to look at.