sometimes i feel limited by descriptors. mostly because i am a mess of contradictions. or, more romantically perhaps, a rebel without a cause.

i am both quiet and quirky, loud and introverted, brash and thoughtful, spirited and contained. i like spicy food and mashed potatoes. i love dogs, and goats too. i can't explain my fear of falling because i am not afraid of heights. i never graduated high school but i did manage college. i consider myself mature (even beyond my years) but sometimes i think too much about the Taylor Swift "Red" concert or how funny grumpy cat memes are. i don't talk to myself, but i think to myself--which is basically a shy persons way of facing oneself. i am scared of silences in public yet i crave the quiet more often than not. i like to be left alone sometimes though i am mesmerized watching the energies of different people. i am a top 40 girl yet i can't stand the sheep/crowd mentality. i am a feminist and still believe in chivalry. sure, i am feminine but i'm tough too (since when does it have to be either/or?). i am not partisan though i'm interested in politics. i want to be a mom but i'm not living to be a mother. i love sleeping but i am a night owl. sometimes i obsess over one song constantly for days, other times i crave the feeling of being surprised by something new. 

also, i am cautious and pragmatic--a girl always with a plan--but i find myself a little lost now, chasing a little dream to a big city and hoping--just hoping--things fall into place. 

i'm shelby. and these are my letters home. 

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